Treasure Hunt: Three ways to raise the fun factor in marriage
by Kathi Lipp
Is something missing in your marriage? Perhaps there’s a shortage of fun. Oh, I know, as a mom, you’re the life of the playground. But would you consider yourself a “fun wife”? More importantly, would your husband?
If your idea of fun after marriage is sleeping kids and separate TVs, it’s time to go looking for that lost treasure. Follow as many of the suggested “steps” below that work for you and your hubby:
Stop Waiting for Him to Make the First Move
While it was a great strategy when you were dating, (there’s a reason our moms told us to play hard to get), it’s a no-win game plan when you’re married.
Whether it’s jumping in on his favorite X-Box game or going to watch him play in his softball league, don’t wait to be invited. Ask if you can go and cheer for him at the baseball field or challenge him to an evening of Guitar Hero.
Get Others on Your Team
Smart women don’t do marriage alone. You need a couple of friends, not only to confide in, but also to inspire you. Keep each other motivated to put the fun back into your marriages.
Know what your husband considers fun and plan accordingly. Once, two friends and I planned a mystery night for our guys that included the men figuring out clues to their favorite pizza joint, the video arcade and dessert at the end of the night. Left to my own devices, our date might have consisted of a rented movie and ordering dinner through a loud speaker. So get a couple of girlfriends on board to inspire you to get out of your marriage ruts.
Take the five-day flirting challenge.
This is where those friends will come in handy. Challenge each other to five days of flirting (yes, in a row) with your man.
Day One – Leave him a fun or flirty note.
This could be on the seat of his car, on his bathroom mirror or on his coffee pot in the morning. Some of the things you could say are: I love you. You’re the best dad. Those jeans are really working for you.
Day Two – Brag on him.
Say nice things about him In front of his kids, his mom or his best friend. And if he can’t be around to hear the bragging – then report back to him. It still counts.
Day Three – Buy him a treat.
Get him something that he doesn’t have to share with your kids.
Day Four – Send him a text.
Again, fun and flirty are the keys here. (And, “Don’t forget to pick up milk!” doesn’t count.)
Day Five – Wear something besides a T-shirt to bed.
If all that flirting and wearing PJs that don’t have a Hanes tag in them leads to some overtime in the bedroom – well let’s just say that you both won the flirting challenge!
Kathi Lipp is a national speaker and the author of four books with Harvest House Publishers including: The Husband Project and The “What’s for Dinner?” Solution. Find more marriage ideas and fun stuff at kathilipp.com.
Coming Attraction: Starting in the November MOMSnext ezine, Kathi will be writing a new column every other month called Real Mom, Real Marriage!