Excerpt from Date Night in a Minivan
I read once that with each child added to a family, thereís that much more stress between the parents, and that much more distance to cross to being close again. I believe it. Whatís stressful about raisin those darling little cherubs we love and adore? Well, for starters, how about the never-ending labor it takes just to keep an active, just-walking turbo tot unscathed and germ free? Often at the end of a day filled with basic child preservation, like most moms I need a break in the worst way. Unfortunately, on such days my husband will end up having an equally harried day at work and he needs a break too. Harassed, strung out, and stick-a-fork-in-me-Iím-done, we are not our best selves when we great each other at 5:30 p.m. On such a crazy day we can be worn out, unhinged, and just trying to keep all the most important balls in the air, at least until bedtime. Yet the kids still need to be fed, bathed, and generally nurtured, so guess where our marriage relationship ranks on the totem pole of life? Low, people, low.
We need to figure out ways to rise above the mayhem that comes with family life and still care for each other, and cultivate stronger ties to get us through the crazy times.