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The Artist's Daughter Book Club: Week One

by Alex

essentials

July 9, 2013

Hello, Darling...
Welcome friends to the July Book Club for MOPS International.

We're kicking off the MOPS International 2013-14 theme, A Beautiful Mess, Embrace Your Story, by reading together the new theme book The Artist’s Daughter: A Memoir.

This book club is a make-it-what-you-need-it-to-be kind of club. You can watch the videos that will be posted the next four weeks and discuss them right here on the new MOPS blog Hello, Darling. Or you can use the videos to get conversation going with your real life friends as you sit and chat face to face. The videos are meant to accompany your reading of the book and offer just a few minutes of insight from me to spur some more thoughts in YOU.

The remaining Tuesdays in July we will be posting a new video right here on Hello, Darling and I will be responding to comments and questions all day. But don’t worry, if you have a camping trip, work schedule or swimming lessons that keep you away on Tuesdays, you can comment any time and keep the conversation going.

Week 1: July 9, Sections 1-2
Week 2: July 16, Sections 3-4
Week 3: July 23, Sections 5-7
Week 4: July 30, Sections 8-11

Before the thought even crosses your mind that you can’t participate, you’re too late in the game, because you don’t even have the book yet, we’ve got big news for you! MOPS has arranged with our publisher Revell for special pricing on all forms of e-books starting right now! This won’t last long (only 10 days to be exact), but you can buy The Artist’s Daughter for 40% off and start reading on your e-reader in only two minutes. Kindle? Yes. Nook? Absolutely. You really can do this and check the “Be in a book club” task off of your summer to-do list. Besides, we will all miss out on your insights if you don’t.

So here we go friends…

Week One: How My Past Shapes Who I Am Today

There is no question where we’ve been – the things that have happened to us and because of us – shape who we are today. They impact our understanding of the world and our place in it. I also understand that my story has had some unique elements that probably don’t reflect yours. But some universal feelings and questions are mixed up in there too.

Our quest to understand Am I lovable? and Am I loved? supersede our individual circumstances. These are universal questions that we all ask. Maybe not outright, but deep in our spirits we are looking for confirmation that yes, we are not only lovable, we are loved.

How we answer those questions in the early years can often set patterns for relationships down the road. Things like forgiveness, performance, handling unmet expectations, are rooted in our identities. And our identities are rooted in these fundamental questions.

                     

 And if you’re looking for more questions for these two sections of the book simply look in the back under Questions for Reflection or download a study guide. Use them for personal time, writing down your thoughts, thinking and praying through what comes out for you. Or post them here in the comments section if you want to move the conversation in a certain direction. And of course use them with your face-to-face friends while you process where you’ve been and how you’ve been shaped.

So here we are, let’s get the conversation going…

What has uniquely shaped your answer to the questions Am I lovable? Am I loved?

Join the discussion for your chance to win a signed copy of The Artist's Daughter PLUS two additional signed copies for your friends! Winner announced Monday, July 15.

 

Share your thoughts

I don't have that warm and fuzzy foundation from childhood. I would say my grandmother has been my #1 supporter and has made me feel like I am the most important person in her life. So, between her love and my wanting a better life for my sons, has led me to educate myself to try to provide a better life for them.

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Personally the "thing" that has uniquely shaped my answer to the questions "Am I lovable" and "Am I loved," were being an only child and moving a lot while I was little. I wanted both of my parents to be proud of me and like Alex one of the things I could control was my achievements. It didn't matter if it was good grades, trying my best in sports, being very friendly and respectful to my friends parents. The thing I could not control was moving. I would generally try my best to make new friends, but in 6th grade I had just had enough. I thought we were just going to move again in a year anyways so why bother. By the time I realized we might be here to stay for a while it was almost too late to make good friends, because I had pushed them away. I also started having the typical teenage strife with my mother. But through it all my parents still were proud of my achievements and supported me. I knew they were proud and loved me through anything that meant a lot.

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My dad of course played a huge role in the formation of my feelings of worthiness. We had many ups and downs but through it all I knew that he fiercely loved me and one one very memorable occasion he protected me from a terrible boyfriend. He died 16 years ago but I thankfully have several letters from him telling me how much he loved me. I am so thankful for my dad. Maybe that is why faith comes naturally to me. The idea that I have a father in heaven is familiar and comforting to me.

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I am completely drawn into your story. It takes a lot of courage to be so candid and share so much of your inner thoughts and feelings with us. Thank you for your boldness. I grew up in a loving Christian family, and I am first born in my birth order. My mother was also a first born daughter, so we clashed often about little things. She is a bit of an artist and a perfectionist, so much of my childhood and early adulthood I felt like she was trying to improve me. I knew she loved me becaus

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Am I loveable? I would like to think so. I think most of the time I am a people pleaser and when I don't please people I worry they don't love me, so I go out of my way to make sure everyone around me is happy and sometimes it make me forget about myself and my own needs. Instead of accepting someones love, I feel I have to earn their love. And I am not quit sure where I learned this or why I am like this. Am I loved? I have always known I was loved from my family growing up, but they are no

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My story (and I'm sure many of our stories) is actually very similar to The Artist's Daughter. We went through the random and very awkward phone calls, the visits that were few and far between, and then finally there was nothing. As the oldest of three kids, I felt the weight of responsibility for facilitating any contact with my father and the crushing guilt when it didn't work out. Back then? My answers at the ripe old age of 11 were pretty different than they are today. I didn't feel ver

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My family was not perfect {and I know that I am FAR from perfect!}, but my parents did a wonderful job telling me and showing me that I was loved and worthy of love while I was growing up. I cannot even pinpoint any specific examples of how they did this, it was just a part of everything my family did. I have never questioned if I am lovable - I just know I am because that's what I was taught. Of course there are times when I have struggled to fit in or feel "good enough," but I have always felt

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